Mamelodi Stories

While this blog has pretty much become a scrap book from the summer of 2005 - life has not stopped! Head over to our new blog, www.mamelodistories.org where we are sharing our experiences as we spend a year serving with Africa Revolution in the township of Mamelodi in South Africa.

A Final Post - For Now

Rebecca and I have been waiting for a good time to write one final post, to put the blog to rest over the winter, until next summer when no doubt more adventures will begin. Because life hasn't stopped since we've been back in the U.S. there's no real good time to do it, so this is a good as any.

Things with my Mom have somewhat stablized, as she receives chemotherapy and we all slowly adjust to the fact that this is real. It's been a rollercoaster of emotion, lack of emotion, helplessness and clinging to prayer, scripture and Grace. I talk to Mom almost every day on the phone and she always sounds upbeat, even when she's really tired or had a bad day with back pain. In my experience with chemotheraphy in high school, I learned how important a positive attitude is. I saw this same attitude in South Africa from Selina, the woman who contracted HIV from her boyfriend who cheated on her. Instead of feeling like a victim, she came to terms with the fact that this is now her life, and is moving forward to embrace the new reality in her life. I think we underestimate the power of our minds to actually bring about in our bodies a reflection of this positive outlook. I'm not saying we heal ourselves, but it almost seems like it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you act like you're going to die any minute, you'll be depressed and your body will not fight. But if you take it by the horns and say, "I'm going to live" then your body responds and fights to survive. I'm not saying we can defeat any sickness, some are too much, but it sure makes living with it so much better.

In other news, Rebecca and I have two new kittens, Pippy and Champ. I've posted a link on the side bar to their website. They stay at Rebecca's house, with an occasional visit to my house. The website from my class in Spain is also finished. There's a link to it on the sidebar as well. My story is called "Wild Horses and Celebrations." Our church, Grace Community Church, became officially organized last week, meaning Ru is our official pastor and we're no longer a church plant. It's exciting and encouraging to be part of a new church as it gets its feet planted. I'm excited to see us reaching out into the community, acting in faith like I witnessed at Vincent's church.

Finally, before I pass it to Rebecca, I am still formulating my thesis this semester through many meetings with Jim Thomas, a professor in the School of Public Health and a pastor at the Chapel Hill Bible Church. He's been extremely helpful in helping me understand the bigger picture of HIV and to dig deeper into how we can help things. If I had to title my thesis right now it'd be: "AIDS, Poverty, and Faith." I will look at what things the Christian Church is doing and not doing to help with AIDS. This thesis will be finsihed in May, so I'll probably do a posting here when its done (it'll be an interactive multimedia website). I am excited to most likely return to South Africa in January to follow up on some things and explore more, now that I have more focus.

...

It's hard to believe that this is our "unofficial" last post to Vicarious Summer. Nate and I want to thank each of you for following our adventures this summer and for keeping in touch by posting comments and shooting emails. A big thank you, too, to those of you who contributed to the "Want to help us out?" link. We have no way of knowing who you are, but thank you! Nate and I got dressed up and cashed in on the blog contributions the other night by enjoying a wonderful dinner date at the Latern in Chapel Hill.

Most of all, thanks for your encouragement and prayers that followed us this summer. We feel so blessed to be surrounded, no matter where we are in the world, by so many wonderful family members and friends.

On my end, finally (!), I've readjusted to being back. Work at NCCAI is going well and I was quickly welcomed into the fold by my colleagues. I'll have my work cut out for me this next year as there is so much communications potential for the Insitute, which is exciting.

Having Pippy and Champ around has been great fun, though it's hard to get anything done while at home! They are just too adorable, and hilarious.

We're going to miss posting to this blog, but as Nate said, we'll be back at it soon enough! Thanks again for reading!

The Challenge Now: Living By Faith

One week since being back in Chapel Hill... it feels weird to be back, and I don't feel settled yet at all. In fact, I've felt distracted all week, between runs to and from the storage unit I kept all summer, returning to Grace Community, seeing Nate, stopping in the J-school, getting moved in to the house, hanging out with friends, meeting the folks at NCCAI, etc... I have not found an equilibrium yet and feel pretty out of touch with myself to be honest.

Most of all, I've felt the challenge of keeping from falling back into a rut. By rut I mean the me before the summer, before all I experienced, the me before my time at L'Abri, the me before all I learned about myself while in London. Driving around Chapel Hill and Durham, walking around campus, I feel like I never left and have even forgetten that the summer happened. I have to think hard to remind myself our Vicarious Summer was only a week ago...

Most of all, I think the challenge now is living by faith in everyday life, and taking risks to test faith. There were instances this summer that amazed me. For instance, when I decided to go to London this summer, I knew I was going without knowing anyone there. No big deal, I thought, I'll make friends pretty easily. I remember that first week, after the bombings, I felt very alone in a city full of people, in need of companions. I asked God in prayer for a friend. The next day I stepped off the bus in Canterbury to see a girl in a T-shirt with a Tar Heel on the back. Enter Sarah and Tara. Crazy too that I happened to see a girl I knew in high school in Birmingham, who I hadn't see in six years, who mentioned in passing when I saw her my last night in Birmingham right before I left for the summer that she had a friend from college working in London. Enter Cara into my life. Even crazier that Nate was in touch with a girl over email for two years who knew his friend Trevor and that she turned out to be Laura Delgado, another close friend of mine from this summer. The most awesome part about this summer was not the travels, not the adventures, not the work experience, not the thrills, but the people. Undoubtedly the people. The fact that all of us girls, with totally distinct personalities, managed to get along so well and travel so easily with one another was a blessing.

Two other things amazed me this summer. Before I left Chapel Hill in May, I really had no idea where I would come back to on the job front after the summer. I handed it over to God, asking that He place me in a setting where I belonged and that the timing would work out. I'm amazed by his grace providing the NCCAI opportunity-- a job that was coordinated, after several lenghty international phone calls, purely on faith both on my end and on the end of NCCAI (we finally met in person yesterday!). Also, I didn't know where I was going to live when I got back to N.C. this fall. God's provision once again with the housesitting opportunity in Durham, again something that coordinated in a way that still can't believe. These two happenings have challenged me though because I'm tempted to think, oh yeah, I figured these out, when really, it was God working in the details all along, opening doors and closing others.

The challenge now is trusting God all over again. I've wrestled with that all week as I realize the changes ahead of me this next year, changes that will require a choice on my part in my approach. Habits are being formed and attitudes are being readjusted...and a greater sense of equilibrium is being reached daily.

"The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of ruts and start searching for different ways and truer answers."--M. Scott Peck

Diagnosis

Mom came home last week, the day I left to come back to Chapel Hill. She's been at home, weathering Katrina (no damage to the house, fortunately), getting stronger and waiting for the final diagnosis. She visited the doctor today, and almost all the results of the tests they've done are in and show that she has Multiple Myeloma, a cancer of the plasma which is treatable but not curable. She starts chemotherapy right away. The dosage is supposedly not enough to cause her to lose hair or get very sick, but it does last 12 months. Patients usually respond very quickly with the symptoms (severe back pain the major one) reducing very quickly. My parents are going to take it day by day. That's the only way we got through the year of chemo I did in High School. That and many prayers, so keep them coming.

As I begin a new semester, adjust to Rebecca having a job (which she starts on Tuesday!), digest everything from this summer and make sense of all that's happening with my mom, life feels a bit out of whack. I've just written and deleted many attempts to explain how I feel, but it's not coming out right so I'll just end with the last two lines of an E.E. Cummings poem:

life's not a paragraph
And death i think is no parenthesis

Sweet Home Alabama

After a delayed flight (surprised?) into Atlanta yesterday, I made it home to Alabama late last night. My parents moved this summer from Birmingham to our family farm in Troy, so that's where I am today. It certainly feels good to be in L.A. (a.k.a. Lower Alabama), surrounded by cows grazing and peace 'n' quiet. I hadn't missed the humidity, though!

So what's next for me and Nathan now that our summer adventures are coming to an end? Nate returns to NC tomorrow and begins classes on Tuesday. He has one more year of grad school in photojournalism and mulitimedia left at the J-School at UNC-Chapel Hill (sad that I won't be going back myself!). Tonight I head home to Birmingham for a few days, to regroup and visit with friends before moving back to NC on Monday. I'll be house sitting this next year in Durham, and I begin work at my new job the week after next. I'll be working in Raleigh as the director of communications for the N.C. Child Advocacy Institute, a statewide nonprofit, nonpartisan organization devoted to improving the well-being of kids and youth around the state. I'm thrilled about joining NCCAI in this newly-created post and am looking forward to the fact that it'll be a challenging, yet very rewarding, position!

Be on lookout for at least one more blog posting from me, collecting my final thoughts about this summer. Many thanks for following along!

Mom is coming home! *UPDATE

***Update
Just before being released the doctors got the result of another test that showed abnormal protein levels. So they're going to move her into a hospital room out of ICU so she can see an oncologist. This has been a rollercoaster for sure, but we're aware that she is in God's hands. Keep praying!
***

Since I arrived in Fairhope, AL on Monday, my mom has been getting better every time I see her. She's currently in ICU only because there are no beds in the main hospital. If everything continues through the night she'll be released from the hospital sometime on Thursday. None of the tests they ran showed anything abnormal, so the doctors are stumped about what could have caused her calcium to go so high and what could have brought it back down. I think it's safe to say that hundreds of people praying had something to do with it. For those of you who prayed, thank you so much! Unless there's a major change, I won't be posting anymore and you can assume she's still getting stronger. Please continue to pray for her recovery.

Last Days in England

Today is my last day in London, and it's sunny here for a change!

I spent the afternoon at the British Museum. I vaugely remember going there as a kid, but to see the vast collections of artifacts from Egypt and Ancient Greece & Rome over again was pretty awesome. The special exhibit on Africa was cool, too. It's totally worth a trip! Incidentally, around the corner from the museum, I made good on a promise to my old boss at the Arts & Sciences Foundation to stop by the soon-to-be-opened UNC European Study Center.

Tonight, Nate and I had planned to go to dinner and the showing of Shakespeare's The Tempest at The Globe Theater. I'm going to dinner instead with my journal, but luckily am meeting up with one of my hallmates for the play. Then, out for one last night with Sarah and Tara! And a full English breakfast with them and my friend Laura is scheduled in the morning before I depart. Many thanks to Laura and brother Pablo for the awesome L'Abri-like discussion we had last night.

These last few days in England could not have ended with a better weekend. If ever in this country, GO TO BATH. Sarah, Tara, and I loved every minute of our time there. Arguably England's most elegant city, Bath is known for being the home of the most well-preserved Roman baths in the world. We were disappointed that there's no spa you can go to (there is, but it's still under construction and was scheduled to open in 2001, 2004, and now 2006...), but our tour of the Roman baths totally made up for this and turned out to be fascinating. While in Bath, we delighted in exploring the town, visiting the beautiful Abbey, shopping at all the little boutiques, enjoying tea at the Jane Austen musuem, spying in on three different wedding parties (one of which for a UNC bride!), and dining at awesome little restaurants. We spent Sunday visiting nearby Stonehenge, and on the way there, caught a glimpse of the Westbury White Horse, a carving into the chalk side of a mountain. To view photos from this past weekend, click here.

The Latest News

Nate made it to Mobile safely last night. His mom has regained consciousness but is still not completely with it. The initial CAT scan results reveal no sign of a tumor, but besides a prognosis of hypercalcemia, not much more is known right now. Continued prayer is appreciated!! Please pray as well that Carol would receive the best medical attention.

Change of Plans: Much Prayer Needed Now

Vicarious Summer Readers:

Nathan expressly asked that I post this blog entry and its details to pass along our shared request: Whether or not you believe in the power of prayer, please, if you are bothering to read this, pray for the Clendenin family.

Late last Thursday night, Nathan's mom Carol was hospitalized for life-threateningly high levels of calcium in her bloodstream, after weeks of mysterious back pain. Carol was stabilized in ICU last Friday, but Sunday her condition worsened. We are still lacking in details regarding the situation, but Nate's dad John and sister Michelle let me know yesterday afternoon (London time), the latest: Carol may have suffered a stroke or seizure yesterday morning. It now appears she's in a coma, and Michelle informed me in the middle of the night last night that she's been put on a respirator. It was clear to us all that Nate needed to get home ASAP. I have been in as close touch as possible with Michelle and John these past few days, and have managed to pass along updates, by both email and phone, to Nate in South Africa; but all of this latest news I learned yesterday as Nate was on a 12-hour flight from Johannesburg to London.

Thankfully, Nathan was scheduled to fly in to London this morning for two final days in the city before the two of us were to head home on Wednesday. I decided yesterday to take a risk and try to find Nate at Gatwick airport early this morning, thus forgoing our original plan to meet up at King's Cross Station here in the city. Many thanks to all who joined with me in prayer yesterday, last night, and this morning that I would catch Nate at Gatwick before he boarded a train to meet me as planned. I was so thankful to spot him this morning (btw, his flight was late, again). I shared with him the latest news, and between prayers, hugs, and tears, another prayer was answered: we managed to get Nathan on the earliest and quickest U.S. Airways flight from London to Mobile, AL.

Please join me in praying specifically that Nate's mom will stay strong these next hours as Nate makes his way home, that the doctors and nurses would be given divine wisdom to assess her condition at present, that Carol would regain consciousness and be restored to health, and that God would shed extra grace and comfort on John, Michelle and Nate at this time. All agree: God alone is in control of this situation, whatever the outcome, and Carol's life and health belong only to Him. I know Nathan is appreciative to all who have already shared their concern, and I am grateful to all of you who have responded to my requests for prayer on his behalf. Now, your continued prayers are coveted as God's love and mercy is poured out on this family!!